(2013, 48 min)
Country: United Kingdom
Director: Matt Carter
Studio: Take a Seat Productions
Language: English
SYNOPSIS: Jayson Bend (also known as “Agent 009”) is an openly gay British super spy! Modeled completely after James Bond, he drives fast and plays hard - always with other hot boys. In this truly impressive parody/homage, the first in an on-going series, Jayson teams up with a sexy Swiss counterpart to try and stop the world’s largest global hair salon chain, and their nefarious CEO, from launching a satellite that will threaten the very fate of human existence. Don’t miss this exhilarating new thrill ride!
REVIEW:
Jayson Bend: Queen and Country sees gay super-spy Bend (Davis Brooks) team up with his Swiss counterpart (Tom Read Wilson) to stop the launch of a satellite that will make salon chain owner Raymond Perdood (Paul Norton) the most powerful man in the world. A joyful peek into a world of gay secret agents, bad guys trying to take over the world and more puns than you could shake your weapon at.
While the creation and execution of the film has been a labour of love for Director Matt Carter, (who worked on almost every aspect of production – check out the number of times his name comes up in the credits) don’t for a second think that this is some tin-pot film shot in someone’s shed one weekend – this is a slick and sexy piece of filmmaking. Every scene is set and shot beautifully, from shadowy concrete bunkers housing Perdood’s lair (and echoing to the obligatory maniacal laugh that Norton pulls off so well) to the headquarters of the Royal Intelligence Ministry in London, proving that although this project didn’t have a huge budget, not a penny was wasted.
Slickly-paced and clocking in at a rather short 49 minutes, Bend doesn’t feel as if it’s lacking in any key areas – there are no weak links, no ropey shots or awkward extras – instead it does everything it needs to, unhurried, professionally and with a cheeky grin. Much like the titular spy himself. While Bend’s tongue is very firmly in his cheek (or someone’s cheek, anyway), it’s never to the detriment of the believability of the movie as a whole: Brooks, Wilson and co. don’t ham it up pantomime-style, instead managing to draw the audience into this world of silly names (Katya Kokov is a personal favourite) and sexy men with ulterior motives.
The entire cast shines, from our two valiant heroes whose interplay is as tense and as sexy as one could hope, to the evil trio who revel in their nefarious ways with just the right amount of malicious glee. Carter’s vision of a gay superspy is no Austin Powers parody; there are no sly winks to the audience, instead a cleverly-created world that hangs together beautifully, dancing along the line between self-aware spoofery and po-faced serious drama. Well, as serious as you can be with a vibrator that doubles as a grenade and smoke bombs disguised as condoms.
Overall Verdict: While many have tried to answer the question of how a gay secret agent would work (SpyBoy, anyone?), I think Matt Carter and his team have given us a pretty perfect answer. Jayson Bend: Queen and Country is a beautifully-realised and gloriously silly love letter to the world’s greatest secret agent. Personally I hope the franchise continues and we see a string of Bend movies, ensuring absolutely no entendre is left undoubled.
Seems only fitting, really.
-- Scott Elliott, Big Gay Picture Show (http://www.biggaypictureshow.com/)
